My Kanye / Taylor Moment.

     Facebook sure does give a warped view of reality doesn’t it? People post only their very best pictures. Most of these pics are digitally altered or at least filtered. No wonder folks constantly feel like they’re never good enough! So much ugly goes on behind closed doors, but we tend to keep that to ourselves don’t we? I want to be a catalyst in changing that trend. I want to open up and speak about both successes and failures, good and bad, ugly and pretty. I feel called to speak about a time recently when I let my ego take over. Every single time I feel as if I’m getting closer to my truest self, my fragile ego pops up and I realize I have a long way to go towards true inner peace. Let me share.

     

     I’ve NEVER been a morning person. Usually, early in the mornings is the worst time for me. I tend to react much more than respond. Well, a few days ago I woke up early and started reading Facebook. I saw that Blue Ridge Outdoors was putting out their annual “Best Of” issue. Not only do they talk about best craft beer, state park, restaurant, photographer, coach, thru hiker, etc, they also have a “Best Adventurer” award. This very much excited me, especially this year! I expected to, at the very least, see my name on the list of nominees for winning the Iditarod Trail Invitational 1,000 Mile race on foot in Alaska. I didn’t. I did see a nurse/rafting guide from VA, A rock climbing guide from VA, a dear friend who is an ultra-runner here in Asheville, an indoor rock climber and a lady who runs a blog called Fat Girl Running. Needless to say, I felt bitch slapped. Boy, did my ego take over. I was pissed off and felt disrespected by my local outdoor community. My fragile ego had been threatened and I didn’t like it.

     

     The first thing I did was write a note to Blue Ridge Outdoors to let them see the error of their ways. I wrote that “a mistake had been made, plain and simple”. Not only that but I was going to write a Facebook post about the slight. I wanted people to agree with me that I had been overlooked. Before I posted, I called my wife to talk this over with her. When I told her I was about to write a post, she called me out. She said “what are you hoping to get from that?” She also said, “You seem really fired up about this and maybe it would be best to take some time to reflect BEFORE WRITING.” She had a point. I thought long and hard about this. Then, I quickly started to feel embarrassed about my reaction. It didn’t take me very long to see that my ego had completely taken over. I quickly wrote Blue Ridge Outdoors and apologized for my petty note.

     

     Not long after my personal epiphany, I got a note back from Blue Ridge Outdoors. They explained to me that all the folks were chosen by the readers of the magazine and they had nothing to do with who was chosen. They then went on to say that they whole heatedly agreed that I deserved to be on that list and they were going to get me on the list ASAP. Not but 5 minutes later I looked at the same list and saw my name. At that time, I also noticed that they had taken one of my dear friends off the list to fit me on. At that moment, I felt as small as an ant. What the hell had I done?

     

     It didn’t take me long to realize that this was a learning experience for me and nothing else. My ego had felt slighted and I felt I had to stick up for myself. What a joke! I called my brother out in Colorado and told him about the situation. He said “I can plainly see how you’re frustrated but I think you’re going about it the wrong way.” He also said “when in the hell have you ever cared about some list in a magazine?” He also had a valid point.

     

     I have so much respect for every single person on that list. After learning about each of them, I am VERY proud of what each of these people have accomplished! They’re VERY worthy recipients and are true adventurers! I wish each of these people all my best. For my friend who was taken off that list, I’m sorry. I hope you can look at this and see it for what it is: a contest that will be here today and gone tomorrow. You’ll be all over magazines in the coming years!

     
     I’m a work in progress. My psychologist had so much fun with this today. He encouraged me to take a long range view of this. He wondered if I would’ve reached out to my wife before I wrote the post 5 years ago. I wouldn’t have.  He was happy that my truest self was understanding of the fact that my damn ego popped up and bit me on the ass again. He reminded me that it will happen again. No Doubt. Oh well, I’m on a path and I see this situation as a chance for personal growth and that is truly exciting to me. Today is a new day! I have new chances to become a better version of myself. I’m not ashamed about this story, in fact I already see this whole situation in a very positive light! With all this said, PLEASE DON’T VOTE FOR ME because I’ll feel like an absolute scum bag if I win this silly thing!

 

Pete Ripmaster

Asheville, NC